No matter where you are, there’s almost always someone you can struggle to get along with, especially in the work place. Whether it’s someone who never stops talking, a person who is lazy, someone who gossips, or even someone who treats you with low regard, you have to deal with it in a professional way. This can be hard, but taking the high road is the key to being successful in these situations.
Here are some tips to deal with difficult people and situations:
1. Breath
Keeping your mindset clear and calm is important. Pride sometimes decides the next steps, but that usually leads to an even worse situation. So, take a breather, and allow yourself to calm down. Once you have done this, you can approach the situation with a professional attitude.
2. Think about who this person is
Are they your manager or your boss? This is the time to set your pride aside and just “let it go.” If they correct you on something and you disagree, thank them and move on. Always show respect. If they treat you unfairly, ask them for more work. Taking initiative is never a bad thing. If your co-worker is being difficult, be patient. Show them some kindness with a simple smile, or offer to help them with something. With a positive response, this will diffuse the chance of elevating the situation, and most likely, their treatment of you will improve or reverse sooner or later.
3. Don’t gossip
We all know not to gossip, yet we still do it. Gossip is a poison that affects everyone it touches. Keeping things private (aside from seeking advice) is really important. Not only does it show maturity, but it helps to keep the situation from blowing up. Even when talking to your close friend at work, your discussion could unknowingly still fall on the wrong set of ears, simply by someone walking by and hearing your conversation. Misinformation is sometimes in the content of gossip. Do not pass information forward unless it is your business and you have checked the source. Using responsible communication means hurt feelings, incorrect information, and even losing your job can be avoided. If you need guidance, go to someone with an unbiased opinion and seek advice.
“There are three sides to every story. Your side, my side, and the truth.”
4. Recognize your imperfections
You are not perfect – no one is! There is a famous cardinal rule to live by: “There are three sides to every story. Your side, my side, and the truth.” You very well may not see what you are doing wrong in a situation, but it is important to find out. Be open to constructive criticism. Make the changes necessary to improve the situation. Do not be afraid to ask how you can improve and be a better employee/co-worker. Improvement never hurts anyone.
5. Talk with the person
Once things have cooled down a bit, but not too much later, sit down and have a talk. Be honest, but do not attack them. Express how their actions made you feel, admit your own shortcomings, and suggest a solution to resolve the dispute. Be as respectful as possible, and where it is due, feel free to forgive and compliment. Who doesn’t like compliments? You could call this strategy a “compliment sandwich.” Compliment-rebuke-compliment. It’s very effective.
6. Talk to someone else
If a conversation with the difficult person does not change anything, consider reminding them kindly of your conversation next time they are difficult. If that still does not work, you can seek guidance from a manager or even HR. They are there to help, so don’t be intimidated to go to them for mediation!
Difficult people and situations are never fun, but they always help you grow and become a better person and employee as long as you keep trying. Remember to approach people with respect and compassion because you never know what is happening in their life. We hope this helps you with any situations that may be hard at work or in life.
As Ellen says, “Be kind to one another.”